Tragedy happens way too often. Our response to it is paramount in our future. Not just our physical and worldly future, but our spiritual future as well.
This past weekend four young adults were taken from their families through a horrendous car accident. One young man, Louis, was a week away from his wedding. He left behind a fiancé with two young children. My husband was to perform the marriage ceremony. It is truly a heart-wrenching story.
As we waited at the Funeral Home to pay our respects to the family, I was amazed at the number of 20-somethings who were drawn together looking for comfort, for answers, for strength to face each new day – not knowing or understanding why.
This is a tragic story. But it is a story not without hope…
As part the wedding process for each couple that he marries, my husband Paul requires that he counsels with them 3 or 4 times. These sessions are sometimes fun, informative, and important. He gives procedural as well as spiritual counsel. About two weeks ago in a session with Louis and his fiancé, Meghan, Paul shared with them an invitation to receive Christ as their personal Savior. Both understood and accepted Him into their hearts and lives. What a joyous day!
At the Funeral Home, as we approached a broken Meghan, she began to cry out, “Because you talked with us, because you prayed with us, I know where Louis is. He is in Heaven!”
Please pray for Meghan and her two children as they continue to deal with the grief and as she grows in her relationship with Her Savior.
HOPE IN THE MIDST OF TRAGEDY
October 29, 2009 at 11:18 am (Focus, Lessons Learned, Love)
IT CHANGED ME….
September 27, 2009 at 7:42 pm (Attitudes, Family, Just Emotions, Lessons Learned, Love, Reality)
Two years ago today, I was sitting in a Doctor’s Office when I heard those dreaded words, “You have breast cancer.” I know that she continued to talk, but I honestly could not process what she was saying. I felt as though a train had hit me. I do remember she repeated to me that I was not going to die from this.
Two years later, I marvel at what all has happened and how I have changed. Yes, I have changed quite a bit. Initially I vowed that cancer would not change me. I fought hard to remain exactly the same. I wanted to be who I always was. But the cancer won and I began to change.
The most obvious changes were physical. I now have a 7½ inch scar. I felt as though my body had played a cruel joke on me. I never saw it coming and I was the object of a nightmarish prank.
I was very fortunate and only required two surgeries for the cancer to be gone. After that, four more for reconstruction and I am pronounced “Finished!”
But I definitely have changed.
Over these twenty-four months I have begun to see the value of family, of friends, of church, of ministry, of life. I realize my own mortality. I know that I cannot “do it all”. I have fought hard not to learn these things, but the cancer taught them to me.
Along with the cancer came some unwanted “friends”. Depression, loneliness, pain, confusion and anger. And each of them, in their own way and time changed me also.
As I look back today, I can honestly say that the cancer changed me and I would not have it any other way. I have more compassion for the hurting, more understanding for the depressed. I know that my own life is not as important as I once thought. There are too many ways I have changed for the better to even list. But I thank God that He allowed me to go down this path. I thank Him for a loving, caring, compassionate husband who was with me each step of the way. I thank Him for children who bring me joy. And I pray that I will not waste one lesson that I have learned because of the cancer.
Forgive me for being a bit “morbid” today, but I just needed to put into words my thoughts. I am praying for each friend I know who is also traveling this most difficult road.
TECHY – I’M NOT!
July 1, 2009 at 11:28 am (Lessons Learned)
Monday was the most “technically-challenged” day of my life! I was ready to through away computers, GPS systems, VCRS, DVDS, my cell phone…Wait, I couldn’t go that far! But it was a frustrating day!
On Saturday, I had tried to upgrade my GPS system. It should have been a simple process…Order it online; pay online; download to your computer; Upload to the GPS system. After 7 hours of downloading, uploading, and stress…IT STILL DIDN’T WORK! I ended up calling the Tech Support on Monday morning. (They don’t have Tech Support on the weekends…I guess if the GPS takes you to the wrong place on Saturday, or it blows up on Sunday, you MUST wait until Monday morning!) Anyway, after waiting on hold for 35 minutes, the Tech walked me through it. He told me I had to have the GPS system turned on the entire time. A simple prompt on the download would have saved me HOURS of frustration. So two hours and a bunch of money later, I was updated and upgraded!
Next issue: In an effort to be more financially wise, two weeks ago I called and cancelled one of the two landline phone lines that was coming into our house. However, our DSL was on that line, so it had to be transferred to the second line. They told me a service tech would come and take care of it for me. Great! I don’t want to be responsible for that kind of “techy” stuff! (Mistake Number 1 – No tech was needed nor was ordered.) I waited most of the day for the tech to arrive. Finally around 3 pm, I called to find the status of the arrival of the Techy. After 5 or 6 phone calls, they informed me the NO ONE WAS COMING! I HAD TO DO IT MYSELF! (One lady on the phone asked me what state I was calling from. I told her before I answered that question, she needed to tell me what state she was in…the Philippines! That is not a state!) On the final call, I reached a man in southern India. (I know you think you know where this is going…just wait.) I began the conversation with, “I am very frustrated and angry at Verizon…I know it’s not your fault, but….!” Mr. Sanya remained calm and assuring throughout the entire process. He even laughed a number of times. (His laugh was very similar to my son’s laugh! Freaky – but comforting!) Mr. Sanya told me exactly what to do. He worked with me and my computers for an hour and a half. At two different times, he was able to “share” the screen with me and fix it for me. When I made a mistake (hit the wrong button), Mr. Sanya would reply, “No problem!” When it was all done, he congratulated me on getting it all fixed. He made me feel like I had done the work. Before Mr. Sanya and I parted ways, he reminded me that I had initially told him of my frustration and anger towards Verizon. He then asked me if I was satisfied with the outcome of our “conversation”.
Relief, Joy, Excitement! That is what I felt. If Mr. Sanya had been anything but kind with me, I think I would have just blown up! But he showed me that it was do-able. He walked me through my difficulty, and made me feel good about it.
Kind of makes me want to walk others through their difficulties and show them Relief, Joy and Excitement!
MERCY!
February 3, 2009 at 10:11 pm (God's Provision, Lessons Learned)
Okay, quick, answer this question: What is mercy? If you are a regular student of the Bible, you will have a “pat” answer. Mercy is “unmerited favor”. See, I have a pat answer. But, what is unmerited favor???
Have you experienced mercy lately? I have. Here’s the story…
January 4th I was on my way to the mall. (I had to exchange a pair of shoes from Christmas.) As I was getting onto the ramp to the highway, a State Trooper pulled me over. (What was I doing wrong? I knew I could not have been speeding. I had my seat belt on. I wasn’t driving erratically. I wasn’t even talking on my cell!) As I handed the Trooper my license and registration card, he said to me, “I pulled you over today because your Inspection expired the end of September.” (WHAT??? Are you serious? That’s not my “area” in our marriage! That is Paul’s! How could this be? September? That was 3½ months ago!) “Expired?”, I said. “I am so very sorry. I really had no idea!”
To make a long story short, I ended up with a ticket! I knew I was guilty, but I really wanted to fight it! So I sent in the necessary $50 “bond” and I plead “not guilty”. Today was my hearing…
I stood before the Magistrate. I was really nervous. He seemed nice (but that could just be a trick). Finally he asked me what had happened. I explained that it had been a hard year; that I had 6 surgeries because of breast cancer. I told him that my mother passed away at the beginning of September. And I went to India for two weeks at the end of September. And then I had surgery October 13. He finished the story for me. “And somewhere in the middle of it all, you lost track of the Inspection.” “Yes, sir,” I said. “Somehow we lost track of it.”
And then he asked me a most important question: “So what were you expecting from this hearing today?” “Well, sir,” I said most carefully, “I was hoping for mercy.”
There it was. The reason I was there. I was guilty. I had driven my car without a valid inspection. I had broken the law. I really didn’t mean to, but I was guilty. But it was easy to break that law. I was too busy with other things (funeral, missions trip, surgery). Those items were all very important and worthy reasons. But I still broke the law.
“Mercy.” The judge seemed to contemplate all that the word meant. “Yes, I think I can show you mercy,” he said. “In fact, we can just make this disappear.”
WOW! Just like that, it was gone! It was all over! All I had to do was ask…MERCY!
EXPERIENCE – A GOOD TEACHER
December 4, 2008 at 10:59 am (Great Teaching, Lessons Learned)
I am finishing a book that was given to me to read on my flight to India. However, instead of reading, I slept! (I just love Ambien.) So, I am finishing The Last Lecture by the late Randy Pausch. In case you don’t know his story, Randy was a professor at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh who died from pancreatic cancer in July of this year. He gave one last lecture in September 2007. This lecture has been put into book form. It is an inspiring book full of wisdom and common sense. I highly recommend it! Here is a short segment taken from the chapter entitled “Be the First Penguin”.
“Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.
“It’s a phrase worth considering at every brick wall we encounter, and at every disappointment. It’s also a reminder that failure is not just acceptable, it’s often essential.
“Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted. And experience is often the most valuable thing you have to offer.”
HIT FOR THE CYCLE
July 4, 2008 at 9:42 am (Lessons Learned)
Anyone who knows me very well knows that I like to walk with my head down. It isn’t that I am discouraged, or down-trodden, or introspective. I am simply looking for lost coins! It is a “hobby” (?) of mine. For whatever reason, I get so excited when I find a coin.
This morning I went for a walk through the neighborhood. It rained hard last night. That makes for a good “coin-finding walk”. Why? Because the storm stirred up the dirt and washed away a lot of the gunk that was covering the lost coins. I actually found a quarter, a dime, and a penny! If I can find a nickel today, I will have “hit for the cycle”!
Okay, so what is the lesson learned? Sometimes God has to send a storm to stir up the dirt and to wash away the gunk. Then our lost coins (our giftings, talents) can be found. And sometimes He expects us to be on the lookout for the giftings and talents in others! It is with great joy when a lost soul, a lost talent is found!
I don’t know about you, but today, I am hoping to hit for the cycle!
LESSONS FROM DAD, PART III
March 1, 2008 at 6:46 am (Lessons Learned)
Final lessons from Dad…
17. If it needs done, do it! Simple truth that is significant. Don’t complain about it. Don’t wait for others to do it. Do it!
18. Take yourself seriously. God gives each person special gifts. He gave them to you to use to their fullest!
19. Church is important – take ownership of the building and the members and get involved!
20. Always pay your tithes.
21. Give to missions. Honor Missionaries. I grew up believing (and still do believe) that missionaries were some of God’s choicest servants.
22. Be friendly. Make others feel comfortable.
23. Always encourage the youth. Dad and Mom were “chaperones” for our youth group way before Youth Pastors were common. We had parties in our basement. And Mom and Dad always went with us to the Youth Convention. It kept them young – and me in line!
24. Have convictions – and stand for them!
25. The Word of God is important to have hidden in your heart.
26. Never waiver in your faith. Situations may change, but God never does.
In conclusion, Dad ALWAYS spent time alone in prayer, every morning, every night. He lived what he believed. I only hope I can be half the example that he was!
LESSONS FROM DAD, PART II
February 24, 2008 at 8:27 pm (Lessons Learned)
More lessons from my Dad…
8. When I have wronged someone, an apology is what Jesus would have me do. This is never an easy thing, but it is good for the “apologer” and the “apologee”.
9. Have a sense of patriotism. Go to parades and stand and salute the flag. Honor our Service Men and Women.
10.If you didn’t die from sticking your finger in a live socket, don’t sweat it. (This is self-explanatory. Dad just assumed that I was trying to stay up late!)
11.Appreciate the lessons learned by those who have gone before you.
12.Hard work has it’s rewards. Dad built our home. When an “unexpected bundle of joy” came into our home (ME!), Dad added on to the house. It was his castle, his finest physical achievement.
13.Appreciate what you have. Learn to be content.
14.Being #2 is okay, if that is where God wants you. I found out later in life that Dad often turned down overtime because it would take time away from his family and his church.
15.Make time to be spiritual. Your devotional life should be a regular part of your daily life.
16.Save coins. One time when Dad was on strike, he needed a pair of shoes. He was able to buy them (and pay for them) with rolls of quarters in a brown paper bag (much to my mother’s horror)!
More later…
LESSONS I LEARNED FROM DAD, PART I
February 22, 2008 at 3:16 am (Lessons Learned)
My Dad, Frank Kasparek, was an incredible man! He passed away three years ago this March 22. He was simple and sincere. By simple, I do not mean a simpleton. I mean uncomplicated and focused about his life. Dad loved and was passionate about four things: 1. God; 2. His family; 3. His church; 4. His hometown. He was patient. (He took my mother, my two sisters and me shopping to Monroeville Mall just about every Saturday!) He was the King of our home. A few years ago, I wrote down the most memorable lessons that I learned from Dad. I would like to take a few blogs to share some of them…
- Family is important! Dad always had time for his wife and his daughters…and his parents, brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews.
- Memories are important – make them special. Dad took ALL of the neighborhood kids Christmas caroling. He took our family to Florida for vacation (in August in a car without air conditioning). Having to do all the driving, it was quite a sacrifice! We (Kathie, Judi and me) will always remember those FUN trips!
- Fruit is good for you. Having lived through the Depression with 12 brothers and sisters, fresh fruit was a treat!
- Never leave straight pins on the carpet. I can still see him jumping as he found one!
- Disappointments will come – God is still faithful!
- Hymns will inspire you. Through the tough times, the good times, the hymns have wonderful anointed words for all ages!
- Learn to see the humor in life! We all loved to hear Dad tell a story, especially when he was laughing too hard to get to the punchline.
Here I go!
February 3, 2008 at 10:34 pm (Lessons Learned)
A few months ago I was introduced to the blogosphere by my son. Since then I have enjoyed reading the thoughts and opinions of so many. I have been challenged, inspired and amused by what I have read. I am not sure what makes me think that I, as a 40-something mother, would have anything to share with others. Maybe it is not so much what I have to share as my trying to be open concerning my thoughts and feelings. I cannot deny that it has been a rough year. I wonder what in the world God is doing. I have asked Him many times (like He has to answer me!). But God, in His infinite wisdom, continues to carry me each moment of the day. Let me share with you my life. I hope to encourage you. Possibly you can learn something from my journey (and my mistakes). And please, laugh with me at my often humorous experiences. So here goes…MY FIRST BLOG!
Just a little more than four months ago, I was diagnosed with early stage breast cancer. It was found in a routine physical that my doctor insisted upon before giving me my immunization meds for a missions trip to India. Needless to say, it was a shock. I must admit, I have never thought of myself having any kind of serious physical problems. I do not remember feeling a lot of fear during this time. I felt numb. I felt like I was in a nightmare. And I felt like I just wanted to curl up on my mother’s lap and cry… Well, three surgeries later, I am still kicking! God has been so good. The doctors have assured me that all of the cancer was removed. It was a “very good kind of cancer, if you have to have cancer”. (Couldn’t the medical professionals phrase that some other way????) I do not need to take any kind of treatments (chemo nor radiation). I just have to deal with an incredibly ugly scar. Enough of all of that! So what have I learned these past four months? I am surprised at some of the things I have learned. I hope to post some of these nuggets to share with you. Now, please don’t think that I would even assume to “know it all”. I don’t. But I do know, for me, God has shown me a lot.
One of the first things that I learned was to “reach deep”. I love entering into God’s presence by listening to the Newsboys, or Mercy Me, or even Casting Crowns. But when I am feeling the most desperate for God, I find that the songs that I grew up with, the “old hymns of the church” are the ones that minister the most to me. I’m not saying that the other songs are not as anointed, but the olds ones that are buried deep within my soul are the ones that have helped me to reach God. Throughout the Pentateuch, the children of Israel are encouraged to tell their children and their children’s children of all that God has done in the past. They are to write it down and to never forget the past. But God also was doing a “new thing” in Israel. Even Jacob was given a “new name” (Israel). So what I am trying to say, God is interested in blending the old with the new, the tradition with the new beginning. In our efforts to be “cutting edge”, I hope that we do not forget the heritage we have.
Any thoughts???
